Inept Phone Service

Welcome to the XYZ Company's electronic answering system. If you know your party's extension, why did you call our main switchboard?

(With Government) You have reached a non-working number at the U.S. Department of Labor, and hence we can't connect you with anyone.

Calls are taken in the order received so please stay on the line so that we can repeat this irritating message at least a half a dozen times. You will not be disconnected, unless, of course, you are.

Your call is important to us, which is why we're willing to tie up your phone for a half an hour.

If you're using a rotary phone, good luck in reaching anyone.

If you're calling from a touch-tone phone and would like to leave a message, press the # sign followed by the number 2, followed by the digits of your social security number...

Once your message is completed, if you'd like to change it, press star button followed by the number 4, or wait for further overly-complex instructions.

To reach a customer service representative, who will practice learning English during your call, press 5.

To reach technical support, press 7 and please make sure you have your customer ID number, equipment serial number, original invoice, and lots of reading material.

For all other departments, please stay on the line where you'll be subjected to Muzak.

Who Could Be Calling Now?

Marc Marchal, 32, was killed in 2003 when his motorbike collided with a tractor near his home town of Rochefort, Belgium. Because of the nature of his injuries, the undertakers advised his family that the coffin should remain closed.

As the family and mourners gathered for a private farewell they fell into a shocked silence, then fled the room when they heard a cellphone ringing from within the sealed coffin. The undertakers failed to notice a cell phone in the deceased's pants pocket.

Let's Take Back our Time

Here is an excerpt of an insightful article by William J. Doherty appearing UU World September/October 2004, called “Let's Take Back our Time”:

“Welcome to the strange new world where being home for dinner is a radical act. For three decades a new spiritual and social justice issue has been arising in our culture and our congregations, but we've been too busy to notice it. It's the problem of time: over-work, over-scheduling, and a chronic sense of hurry. We have become the most productive and the most time-starved people on earth...”

“This is a spiritual issue as well as a social justice issue for us as Unitarian Universalists. Overbusyness has spiritual effects. Every spiritual tradition emphasizes the importance of silence and repose; most have some form of Sabbath and seasons of reflection. Our culture of busyness is antithetical to the spiritual life. The Trappist monk Thomas Merton expressed it well in Confessions of Guilty Bystander:

There is a pervasive form of contemporary violence, and that is activism and overwork. The rush and pressure of modern life are a form, perhaps the most common form, of this innate violence. To allow oneself to be carried away by a multitude of conflicting concerns, to surrender to too many demands, to commit oneself to too many projects, to want to help everyone and everything, is to succumb to violence. The frenzy of our activism neutralizes our work for peace. It destroys our own inner capacity for peace because it kills the root of inner wisdom which makes work fruitful.”

Wellness On Wheels

Here’s a site apparently for the ultra-frantic: Wellness On Wheels – “Most people live life at a frantic pace-rushing around in the morning, getting ready for work, dealing with rush hour traffic, working through lunch, racing home to find something, anything, they can call ‘dinner’, and then try to catch up on all the personal responsibilities at night or on weekends. It’s exhausting!”

“We come to you! No travel time, dealing with the weather, or getting yourself psyched up to work out - we bring the health club to your door! And when we show up at the appointed time, we also provide focus and motivation, ensuring that the time spent exercising is safe and effective!”

A Book Offer You Can't Refuse

Results Rule! Build a Culture that Blows the Competition Away, has been published by John Wiley & Sons. It share lessons the author, Randy Pennington, has learned from over 20 years of helping leaders and organizations build cultures focused on results. This book shows anyone – from the frontline to the boardroom – how to build and contribute to an organization that delivers results year after year after year. Results Rule! explains how to:

1. promote honesty and candor as you tell yourself the truth about how your organization is viewed and what is standing in the way of its success

2. pursue the best over the easiest in every decision and action

3. leverage the power of partnerships both internally and externally

4. focus the energy to make the main things the main thing and execute flawlessly

5. continuously learn, grow, and improve because past success proves you were right once

6. show the courage of accountability personally and promote a culture of accountability with others

If you purchase at least one copy of Results Rule! this week, the author will give you more than $75 worth of special gifts including:

a. A complimentary MP3 download of three of Randy's audio programs: Integrity-Driven® Leadership, Make Change Work, and the Results Rule! audio that led to the book ($29.95 value!)

b. A complimentary download of his first book, On My Honor, I Will: Leading with Integrity in Changing Times, in ebook format. ($14.95 value!)

c. A minimum 20% discount off the price of the book. Regularly $24.95, you pay only $19.96 or less!

Go to http://www.resultsrule.com/purchase.asp to get all the details.

Ask People for Favors

As a boy, Benjamin Franklin asked the governor of Pennsylvania for a
book. In his autobiography, Franklin cites that moment as the beginning of
his publishing career.
He also learned the importance of asking people for favors. People
will then ask you for a favor in return, and thus one forms a free exchange,
the foundation of all business: "one polite request at a time."